One of my friends posted a question on Facebook last night: “Mention something you were good at in high school.” It reminded me of how I felt in high school. I was a social chameleon, fitting in with whatever group I was with at the time. I always thought that I fit in everywhere and yet nowhere at the same time. The first reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians reminded me of that.
Paul talks about being whoever he needed to be at the moment. He wasn’t interested in himself, but the salvation of those he encountered. As I go this morning to a silent retreat for three days in preparation for ordination, this reading speaks to me. Especially this part: “an obligation has been imposed on me,
and woe to me if I do not preach it!
If I do so willingly, I have a recompense,
but if unwillingly, then I have been entrusted with a stewardship.”
Stewardship requires faithfulness, obedience. The message that God is calling me to preach is not one of my own. It’s not even a choice for me. The hound of Heaven, as one poet called it, never ceases pursuit. Psalm 84 reminds us of what our soul is yearning for, the only thing that will satisfy this desire. He designed us for Him, and only in Him will we find rest. “My heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.”
Jesus in the Gospel then reminds us of the key to that relationship. Jesus says: “when fully trained, every disciple will be like his teacher.” That’s a tall order when your teacher is God Himself. Paul and Our Lord Jesus want us to remember that there is a big picture. Something bigger than ourselves. We don’t need to sweat the small things.
Paul is working with a community to help them see that there are some things which we can compromise on, and some non-negotiable stuff. We don’t need to get bogged down in the petty details. It isn’t easy sometimes to distinguish between trivial and essential. That’s why Jesus trained disciples. Those disciples taught their students, and an unbroken line of teachers leading back to Jesus still exists today, the Church.
That’s why we go to the Sacred Deposit of our Faith to understand dogma and what can change with the times. All of this has one object in mind, relationship. The message means nothing if the love isn’t apparent. Trying to preach the Gospel while despising Jesus is very much pointing out splinters while having wooden beams blocking our vision.
Being a steward is the lower part of the bar. The goal is to let our passion flow, our desire for Jesus to overwhelm us until the love story that is the Gospel flows from our lips as our lover’s lingering kiss. Imagine the impact we would have if we spoke of baptism like our wedding day, first communion, our honeymoon, and faith as a journey with the one we love.
That’s why Paul says he doesn’t just playfight in this spiritual battle. He drives his body; he trains it for war. Because brothers and sisters, this relationship with Jesus is worth fighting for.
A reflection on the readings for Friday of the 23rd Week in Ordinary Time: September 11, 2020.